I
went to study Language and Literature
and
fell like the Hanged Fool for the
rope of theatre,
hung
myself on that stage, dangled
upside
down: Watched the world
slide
by while thoughts in my head
were
filled in with the words of others — had they too
hung
and spun,
examined
the world as if it were frozen
and
the only thing that moved
was
my desire
as
it seeped passed flesh and heart and ear and lip?
I
remember Visions.
I
remember an apple
and
the impulse to say whatever.
I
remember the three-way script
spun
outwards like a web to snare an audience in ways
I
had never fathomed.
I
remember I wrote a piece about Russian Caravan Tea
and
listened to my words plunge as if I were a well
and
(having filled the page) became empty and filled again
by
hearing someone else speak my mind.
Once
we travelled like beetles to Sydney,
listened
to playwrights rewrite their histories
and
then there was the tour into the countryside:
There
was day in the middle of an oval,
the
band through Paul finding a way to heaven,
the
kids, the dispersing clouds that spun away
like
the old sheets on mum’s clothesline, the sun and I…
I
swear if I could I would hold that day forever.
And
the time I watched Elena and Neil find and lose themselves
in
The Woods
that
too I would hold
and
the Vowles, the Cliffs…
The
very fabric of me
stretched
out and tossed by the hands of fellow learners of the craft,
by
dancers and singers and lovers and friends,
only
to fall back again and cover my skin as if nothing had changed
and
it hadn’t and it had
just
like the very best of things.
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